Tag Archives: Life

How to Live Beyond the Ordinary

On her other blog, today’s guest-writer Nezel Yurong, an aspiring yogi and mother of two boys, wrote already in “Purposive Ninja Virtual Professional” about qualities we can acquire to make our life as enjoyable as possible.

We should know that our mindset is very important for the way how our life is going to develop. We should also know it is essential to have the right attitude to reach our goal in life. As such we should be very well aware that everything starts with a positive mindset.

She reminds her readers to

Believe that you can achieve the goals you set for yourself. Obstacles are inevitable. Whatever they may be, just have the faith and determination that you can overcome them. {Purposive Ninja Virtual Professional}

And repeats the same call we can not warn enough people to be persistent, continuing to try to get to their goal, never to give up.

Though we have to be careful Nezel warns

Do not push too hard on people or on yourself. You may make it slow according to your capacity; just keep moving forward. {Purposive Ninja Virtual Professional}

To do that we often need a lot of patience.

According to Beverly Sills, “there are no shortcuts to places worth going.” Get into the mindset that the wait will be worth it. Always take massive action. And remember that great things take time. {Purposive Ninja Virtual Professional}

Everybody shall encounter enough people who want to stop them dreaming, or even worse stop them reaching their goal. whatever the cause may be, a.o. jealousy, hear what they say and how they say it, but let it not drag you down. Look around in the world and find the interesting people who can inspire you or coach you and help you develop further in an ever changing world where you want to be receptive to and to be willing to make use of the new technologies.

 Adjust your sails to the different weathers of your journey. Keep on learning. And have an open mind to possibilities and opportunities. {Purposive Ninja Virtual Professional}

Our guest-writer recognises the good thing with life is that we are all born ordinary and we all can bring gifts to offer to the world from the day we were born. We may come into this world as a nobody and than have to work ourselves up onto that ladder so many expect so much.

When we grow up we may encounter experiences which might embarrass us much. ({Making Most of the Gap from a Nobody to Somebody}) On our way we can come to sit in an unproductive environment and seeking for something that gives more meaning and purpose to life. It’s possible we come to face weeks of soul searching, discovering we need to let go of some things before we can successfully embark on a new journey, which on many different occasions we shall confronted with.

Often a big problem people then face when they come on such ‘crossroad’ or ‘turning points’ is that they have difficulties with the confrontation and the changes they perhaps have to make.

They need to shake off the dust from their feet. No matter others might have been born with a silver spoon in their mouth, that does not make them extraordinary nor should let us feel sorry for ourselves.

We should remember

Being extraordinary is an inward thing. It is a journey. It is a choice.

Let us never forget our better self, believing in the self, getting to nurture the gifts which are given from birth.

As Richard Dawson said,

“Be nice to each other. You can make a whole day a different day for everybody.”

Nezel adds

If we want to be remembered or leave a lasting legacy, we have to muster all our strength to build up others.

We have to accept whatever the present puts in our table. The present is just the way it is. If there is something we don’t like in the present moment, we have to accept it, then tweak something that would promise us a favorable future.

A Better Perspective+

Preceding articles

  1. If Doubt
  2. Fear, struggles, sadness, bad feelings and depression
  3. Failures, mistakes and Initiatives for Excellence and success, Working towards turning a Dream of yours into reality
  4. Life
  5. Life Is A Marathon
  6. The world starts with yourself
  7. Facing our existence every day
  8. Inner Voice
  9. The I Am to explore
  10. There can only be hope when there is a will to be and say “I am”
  11. Confidence…
  12. Self Help Guide
  13. Believe today and now!
  14. Believe in yourself!
  15. Wishy-Washy…
  16. Watch out
  17. Believe in your greatness
  18. Be Kinder to Yourself
  19. How do Other People Feel About Mental Health?
  20. Gender connections

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Additional reading

  1. Determine the drive
  2. Not holding back and getting out of darkness
  3. Only one person who has the power to cast the deciding vote that will kill your dream

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Further reading

  1. “How Was Your Day? – “Fine.”
  2. Why it is important to love yourself before you love another
  3. Is Happiness a Pursuit?
  4. Why daily means daily…until it doesn’t
  5. If it’s Broken
  6. Failure V Feedback
  7. SDR 1158: Most People Overestimate What They Can Do In A Year And Underestimate What They Can Do In Ten Years – Tony Robbins
  8. Doing This Stuff Is Boring
  9. Mindset: How To Get Over Depression (4 Steps) – How To Stop Feeling Depressed and Sad – Feel Happy Again
  10. There Is Nothing More Important You Can Do Than Learn To Control Your Thinking!
  11. Know-How Not Lotto
  12. Finding Your ‘Why’
  13. For The Love Of Money Or Happiness?
  14. F.E.A.R
  15. Fear, our best enemy / La peur, notre meilleur ennemi
  16. SDR 1157: Don’t Be Lazy To Learn From Your Experience
  17. 5 Characteristics of people who Fail at Failing
  18. Growth mindset?
  19. Life: Empow(HER)ment
  20. Turning Dreams Into Reality
  21. Awaken Your Mind, Awaken Your Senses
  22. Monday Motivation
  23. Motivation Monday 43
  24. How to keep that Monday ‘spark’ going all week….
  25. Weekend Thought #13 – Determination
  26. 5 Tips To Developing a Growth Mindset
  27. 5 simple ways to be more successful
  28. Week Two: What’s Your ‘WHY’
  29. What If It’s Not About Getting It Right?
  30. Much to learn you still have…This is just the beginning. A guide to Lifelong Learning.
  31. 5 Happiness Blog Posts I’ve Written Recently
  32. You Either Win or Learn
  33. Exploring Possibilities…
  34. Coming to A Head
  35. Needs V.S Wants?
  36. Good Things Come to Those Who…
  37. The Eyes Are The Window To The Soul
  38. 10 Lifelessons from Confucius
  39. Grattitude changes everything
  40. Living a Life Worthy of the Gospel

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Purposive Writer

Living beyond the ordinary

I read somewhere of someone asking how to make her life extraordinary. Is your life ordinary? Mine too. The good thing with life is we are all born ordinary. Yes, others may have been born with a silver spoon in their mouth, but that does not make them extraordinary. Outwardly, perhaps. They live in huge abode than anybody else, do not need to clean their toilet like anybody else, and even have bodyguards and assistants who are always attentive to their every need.

Still, those things do not make someone extraordinary. Being extraordinary is an inward thing. It is a journey. It is a choice. Media may have its definition about being extraordinary by the way some things or people present themselves. That is why many aspire to be great, famous and wealthy in order to become extraordinary. Worse, they do all means whether acceptable or not just to get…

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For ever changed by spiritual experience

Often people do not think much about God until something happens in their life. In life we have to face different circumstances and have to undergo different circumstances. Often whenever something serious happens and we have to face a life threatening experience, than we’re confronted with the Highest Being. Once we have had a spiritual experience, we are forever changed. We may try to forget, ignore, or run away from it, but our contact with the Divine realm will never again allow us to completely immerse ourselves in mundane life, whether to indulge in empty diversions or to try to improve the world through purely secular means.

In the time before the offering of Jeshua as a Lamb of God people had to bring offers to the altar, and everything whatever touched the Altar became sanctified when it where really things that were worthy of being brought upon the Altar in the first place. Today too we can say that everything or every one which or who comes before God or to the Altar of God must be worthy to come before God.

Easter postcard circa early 20th century

Easter postcard circa early 20th century (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Normally every Jew, Christian and Muslim should be clean, not taking part to pagan festivals or pagan rites. Though in Christendom we find a majority not bothering about God’s Laws. They seem not to bother if what they do would be against the Will of God. For many Christians Spring has started yesterday and soon they shall celebrate Easter, the feast for the pagan god Eostre, the god of fertility which they shall honour by the rites of offering eggs and honouring the fertile bunnies. Those eggs and Easter bunnies have nothing to do with Jesus his resurrection. Their resurrected god is also not the Elohim Who cannot die, God being an Eternal Spirit. Also the Easter fires have nothing to do with the sacrificial offering of Christ, nor his standing up from the dead.

A Cute Little Bunny With Some Eggs

A Cute Little Bunny With Some Eggs (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

By taking part to such pagan rites, their hands are defiled and should they know that they may not come clear to the altar of God. In the weeks going up to that most important day of the year they should have had moments of reflection, having been conscious about the necessity to please God and not to please the world. Schools, workplaces, clubs, may all want to have the pagan symbols of the Spring time and may love the festival decorations, but real lovers of God should abstain from them. They should have cleansed their soul, and should have meditated on the Word of God and His mitzvah.

From Land to Land - Going to shul (synagogue).

From Land to Land – Going to shul (synagogue). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Every person who calls himself Christian, should be a follower of rabbi Jeshua, the Kristos or Christ, who worshipped not himself but his heavenly Father, the only One true God. Like he went up to God His Altar really offering himself for the sins of all, he came up to the mountain out of the walls of the city Jerusalem, to be slaughtered as a Lamb. Though we probably shall never be able to be as pure as him, we should try to do our utmost best to become like Christ, pure and clean. But spiritually, each of us should fall into that accepted category, for every child of God possesses intrinsic holiness; the true desire of every Jew and every Christian should be to do what the Most High God commands.

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Preceding articles

Making sure we express kedusha for 14-16 Nisan

Reciting the Aleinu as a warning against temptation of idolatry

More on Grace and Spiritual Fruit – Abide in Me, and I in you

Broken, coming before God

Easter: Origins in a pagan Christ

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Additional reading

  1. Eostre, Easter, White god, chocolate eggs, Easter bunnies and metaphorical resurrection
  2. High Holidays not only for Israel
  3. 14-15 Nisan and Easter
  4. Death of Christ on the day of preparation
  5. Seven days of Passover
  6. Altered to fit a Trinity or Ishtar the fertility goddess
  7. Peter Cottontail and a Bunny laying Eastereggs
  8. Risen With Him
  9. Creation of the earth out of something
  10. Ember and light the ransomed of Jehovah
  11. Because men choose to go their own way

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Further reading

  1. Behind the Scene
  2. Spiritual experience
  3. A Mammoth & Moving Spiritual Experience
  4. Is your spirituality speaking the unspeakable, scruting the inscrutable & effing the ineffable?
  5. Understanding Trauma
  6. Absence of light
  7. Friday: The Language of the Heart
  8. Thank-You Lou Riley: An Unexpected, Powerful Spiritual Experience
  9. Different Ways of Approaching the Problem of Evil

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Life Is A Marathon

Orlando Espinosa, a former educator, signed up to have an amazing life, regardless of the obstacles he may have to face. He is convinced that

Having a positive attitude is the key and moving forward is essential!

He has blog has some great images on his blog and offers a lot of pictures we all remember well from childhood. For him

Life is an amazing journey, too often taken for granted! It’s great being able to enjoy the simple things it offers! It feels great to be alive with a purpose!

Though in order to keep the momentum going in our life we shall need to maintain the pace, energy and enthusiasm from when we  first started! {Keep the Momentum} But we should be fully ware that we may not back down! {Don’t Back Down}. Always we should be prepared to believe in ourselves.

 

There has to come a point in life when you need to believe in who you are and what you have to offer.

Believing in yourself is one the key to achieving success in life.

You have to do what you want because there’s no one who can stand in your place.

You have to know that you are so much better than what they say…

If someone says you can’t do anything, don’t believe them, let it be a driving force to prove them wrong.

Be confident!

Get to know yourself and grow with new experiences.

Don’t be held back by a “fear”.

Don’t let people knock you down with their words of doubt! {Believe}

Believe-in-Yourself-Motivational-Orlando Espinosa

 

 

Defining what we value begins by recognizing who we value. {The Journey!}

He also warns not to

allow others to hold you captive because you don’t know what freedom feels like!
Some people feel the need to imprison others with their words and by their actions!

Orlando Espinosa

Life isn’t a sprint, but a marathon! In order to finish a marathon you need stamina and consistency: you will need to hold a steady pace in order to cross the finish line!life is a marathon-orlando espinosa

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Patience is also a form of action

heart prints

Processed with Rookie Cam

Waiting is definitely a test. It tests our patience and our loyalty. It tests our love and our mercy. Waiting is not for the weak. (Lee Young)

I consider myself a patient person but waiting on God changed me forever. Waiting chiseled at my rough edges. It revealed to me my true character. It accentuated the distance between God and me.

I find it hard to deal with God’s silences. I want quick solutions to difficult problems and God’s timeline hardly ever aligns with mine.

Wait. Be patient. Why is it so easy to say, but so hard to do?

When I look back on the seasons of my life, I must admit that I act differently during the times of testing. My conversations with God often fill up with frustration and anger and it is difficult to keep impatience from spilling into my spiritual life. These are the times…

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Dealing with Disappointment

A writer who has three teenage sons and one teenage daughter, all of them were born about seventeen months apart has a family life like any other in which good and bad things may happen. Having been immersed in diapers, runny noses, and sticky fingers full on in those years this writer looks at what disappointment may be.

Grief

Grief (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

She has loved with as much vulnerability as she could, but have wonders if she trained them well. When facing the day again many thoughts may come up in our head and questions may whirl around our head.

Do they know where to turn when the battle around them rages on. When their hearts are hurt, when there is fear or remorse? Do they know how to forgive and how to extend grace?

As parents we try to prepare our children. We try to make them strong enough so that they , at their turn, shall be able to look at the world, go into it and accomplish many things. Hopefully not having to suffer to much and hopefully not to end up to be disappointed.

For sure they too shall have to face ‘Disappointments’, but what would they be?

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To remember

  • It looks different for everyone…it is deeply personal.
  • Maybe … describes an unmet need, a missed opportunity,…a loss > cut deeply, become hard to move through + settle deep in the spirit, festering… leaving holes in beating hearts. => rob the heart fibers of joy.
  • Disappointments left untended => create bitter roots reaching deep…souring the soul and poisoning the body.

She felt that kind of life-threatening disappointment. The kind that will suck the very breath from your lungs.

  • the climb too hard + the terrain too exhausting = journey seems impossible.

What is your mountain? A failing marriage…children running from home or faith…a body broken with sickness…a heart crushed with grief? Betrayal from a friend?

  • Our life will be messy + take place among the brokenness in the world.
  • Brokenness around us…brokenness living within us =  living among the weeds. 
  • when we feel empty > dull, lonely heartache

The writer has learned not to let her fleeting feelings rule + reign her thoughts about a current circumstance.

  • God has given an entire range of emotional experience to explore = freedom bring great joy + excruciating heartache.

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Please concerning the last part of the text we want to say that we best pray to God. We also may be thankful to Jesus and give him praise, but we may only give the highest praise and worship to the heavenly Father of Jesus.

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Preceding articles

Preceding

Our existence..

Facing our existence every day

Facing daily events and exclaiming “Good grief!”

Reminding myself!!

Are you right down in the dumps? Stop digging!

Ruth having reason to grief

A look at the Poet’s corner’s grief basket

Some Thoughts On Bitterness From Various Authors

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My life in words...

What is your disappointment? It looks different for everyone…it is deeply personal. Maybe for some, it describes an unmet need, a missed opportunity,…a loss. Some disappointments cut deeply, become hard to move through…things that settle deep in the spirit, festering… leaving holes in beating hearts. Disappointments like these rob the heart fibers of joy. Disappointments left untended, create bitter roots that reach deep…souring the soul and poisoning the body.

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Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy;
without holiness, no one will see the Lord.
See to it that no one misses that grace of God and
that no bitter root grows up
to cause trouble and defile many (Hebrews 12:14-16)

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I have felt that kind of life-threatening disappointment. The kind that will suck the very breath from your lungs. Some situations feel unresolvable… the unreasonable requests to keep working, keep trusting, keep pursuing. The God-breathed invitation to…

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Ruth having reason to grief

Ruth in Boaz's Field

Ruth in Boaz’s Field (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Ruth had every possibility to become bitter. She lost her husband and her father-in-law, but she determined to follow God in the midst of that. She was faithful to her mother-in-law and did what she could do to provide for them both. Then, everything turned around at the threshing floor when she asked the wealthy landowner of Bethlehem, and kinsman of Elimelech, Naomi‘s late husband, Boaz to take her under his wing as her kinsman-redeemer. Her encounter with her kinsman-redeemer changed her life and the course of history as she was grafted into the line from which Jesus was born.

We can now look up at that man from the line of king David. He also has suffered a lot and also caused others to have lots of pain. But those around him carried their sorrow and where pleased to be privileged to have known this remarkable man.

For those around Jesus life was not easy. His disciples where even caught by such fear that they did not dare to come in the public any more, until they received the fire of the Holy Spirit.

For us life also presents its difficulties. It is not all glamour and happiness. Life can be hard at times. Disappointments come. Sometimes, we disappoint ourselves, but often we also bring disappointments to others. Like we can be hurt by others we too can cause pain to others. In  life we shall fall more than once and each time we do have to get up again. It is how you manage to cope with all those difficulties that shall make you or break you. What you do next determines the fruitfulness of the rest of your life.

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Preceding articles

Our existence..

Facing our existence every day

Facing daily events and exclaiming “Good grief!”

Reminding myself!!

Are you right down in the dumps? Stop digging!

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Additional reading

  1. If there is bitterness in the heart
  2. Remember there’s a light in the next day
  3. Partakers of the sufferings
  4. Disappointed expectations
  5. Fragments from the Book of Job #7 Epilogue
  6. Thirst for happiness and meaning
  7. Be happy that the thorn bush has roses
  8. Happy is the person who knows what to remember of the past
  9. Whom can we trust to govern us?
  10. Looking forward to the return of Jesus
  11. Commit your self to the trustworthy creator
  12. Singing gift from God
  13. The truest greatness lies in being kind
  14. Let’s Talk Happiness
  15. Happiness mapping and getting over gender mapping
  16. There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving
  17. Looking at the Source of joy
  18. Joy: Foundation for a Positive Life
  19. International Day of Happiness!
  20. Preparing for the Kingdom
  21. How can we prepare for the Kingdom of God
  22. If you do pray you shall not be disappointed
  23. Hope does not disappoint us
  24. Have a real happy day today!

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Further reading

  1. Hard. Heavy. Cold.
  2. Child of the world – Bitterness
  3. Battles and Bitterness
  4. Some Thoughts On Bitterness From Various Authors
  5. Holding On
  6. Letting Go
  7. Loving on the Bad Days
  8. Healing’s Strange Path
  9. When the Water is Bitter: How to come through bitter experiences with peace and purpose
  10. uprooting bitterness
  11. Chains
  12. Don’t Harden Your Heart
  13. “A Joyful Heart Is Good Medicine”
  14. Forgiveness Brings Healing
  15. The Place of In Between
  16. Dealing with Disappointment
  17. Note to self…Oct. 29th
  18. Steal Your Happiness — Orlando Espinosa
  19. Seek the best! Luke 6:35
  20. Trusting Him
  21. Heart Failure
  22. 30 Seconds On Grace

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A letter to love

Love one of the most difficult things to understand and to grasp.

Today we bring a poem by a dreamer with some creativity in writing his poem which he placed on his blog Magic nature poem in 2014. There he seems to go in conversation with his heart what makes him feel, makes him heal, though which also plays some tricks on him. {A letter to my heart}

In this life where we are like in a rollercoaster which goes up and down he finds that our lives are changeable.

When life is dark we decide how others see us.
We can show them that we feel mad or we don’t.
We can choose it.
It is the same when life is wonderful.
We can decide whether we show it to others or not. {Life and a rollercoaster}

People represent their lives in a world that blogger wants to show to us. A pity that he does not bring tags to his articles, so that people can find related articles to what he writes on a certain day. But his blog is worth a look at. He shows how we are surrounded by energetic creatures.

Humans, animals, plants, earth, universe within planets, suns, stars, moons, everything.
We are all parts of something  very big.
Everyone is a part of a very big energy.
We all seem to be seperate
But that is not true.
We are all connected by our energies.
A network consisting of our individual energies.
We fulfill the universe. {Energy #4}

With everything we see around us in our heart there has to be a fire. A fire of well feeling and a fire of love. Without love we are nothing.
It is

… taking and giving
You hurt and make us happy
You are everything and nothing
What are you?

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magicnaturepoem

Dear love

What would a life be without you?

You are taking and giving
You hurt and make us happy
You are everything and nothing
What are you?

You are invisible
Makes people believe to be invincable

You are this feeling
Shows us, you make us healing

Somehow you are playing with us
You know we have to deal with you
Because what would a life be without you?
For me and for you
No choice
We need you

Having people in our hearts
Because of you
It makes us believing
It gives us strength
We are never lonely because of you
You take our hands and speaks out loud of our hearts
We have to listen to you
Sometimes you hurt, sometimes you make a dream come true

Love, you are special, you make us special and makes the ones special we love.

In love my thoughtful me talking…

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Life Goes On

Today’s guest-writer with his decease knows that  whether we’re going through the worst of times or the best of times, history and our own experiences show us that life does go on.

Though we can not say this to everybody at any time.

“There is an appointed time for everything.
And there is a time for every event under heaven —
A time to give birth and a time to die…
A time to weep and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn and a time to dance.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4)

I thought about the above passage last week when our daughter gave birth to a beautiful seven pound girl on Wednesday, then a close friend died of cancer on Friday – “A time to give birth and a time to die.”

Twenty years later after our guest-writer Bill was diagnosed with ALS he still goes strong and inspires many people with what he writes on the net, reaching many in countries who would never come to. His writing are clearly inspired by God’s Spirit, Who is able to give incredible powers to those who are willing to give themselves in the hands of God.

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To remember

life’s great highs + lows = day-to-day life > seem so trivial

we tell ourselves that we’ll never again settle for the trivial life

our emotional or spiritual highs & lows gradually find their old balance => return to a mundane normalcy

=> root cause of much of addiction + depression we see around us

answer? = “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.” (Romans 12:15)

focus not on the personal and professional “highs” missed => make  conscious effort to focus on  good things in life

Life = hard == much easier if we surround ourselves with people that won’t only rejoice with us in the good times but will also support us in the difficult times.

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Preceding: Why are you afraid?

 

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Further reading

  1. What Would You Say?
  2. Time slowed
  3. Courting Joy
  4. Still Life
  5. Survivor or Fighter?
  6. 5 Things You Need to Know About Life (1 min read)
  7. Opportunity Meets Impression! (2 min read)
  8. The Road Ahead
  9. Solace Can be Found
  10. It starts again….
  11. Silent Screams
  12. Just
  13. On the topic of crying
  14. Fibromyalgia and remission
  15. Suicidal thoughts
  16. Behind the face,  the mask. 
  17. Dignity
  18. 005 Coping with depression
  19. Losing Friends, Making Friends
  20. Experimenting
  21. Daily Shorts – Can I Run Away?
  22. Perfect Love
  23. Depression I
  24. It feels weird 
  25. The Steps of Falling Apart
  26. Better Days: Creating Change
  27. 02.47

Unshakable Hope

“Life Goes On”

Whether we’re going through the worst of times or the best of times, history and our own experiences show us that life does go on. This is true, but I don’t recommend saying “life goeson” to someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one.

“There is an appointed time for everything.
And there is a time for every event under heaven —
A time to give birth and a time to die…
A time to weep and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn and a time to dance.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1-4)

I thought about the above passage last week when our daughter gave birth to a beautiful seven pound girl on Wednesday, then a close friend died of cancer on Friday – “A time to give birth and a time to die.”

Those who are grieving and those who are rejoicing have this…

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When you stay in your lane, there’s no traffic.

By Liza Borstlap

image

I found personal happiness as a direct result of family conflict. The interaction left deep scars and I spent many years mourning the loss of my family and my relationships with them. It remains a questionable subject and not every person that I meet fully understands the extent of the consequences of my decision.

Looking back on my history with my family, I can identify the tipping point where I made a final decision that set me completely free.

A lifetime can well be spent correcting and improving one’s own faults without bothering about others. (Edward Weston)

Make it your goal to live a quiet life, minding your own business and working with your hands, just as we instructed you before. (1 Thessalonians 4:11)

The wind blows where it pleases, you hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit. (John 3:8)

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We talk about family as if it is a perfect unit that shields the individual from a cruel society. We remain silent about the interference, the neglect, the labelling and toxic in-fighting that often leaves a person with a limp. We secretly cover the failures and mishaps until we can identify the black sheep that can take the blame.

I came to believe that the conflict in my family had created itself. I was suffocating from the indifference and interference in my life. The emotional agitation and stress became so unbearable that I had no inner peace left. For my own self-preservation, I became emotionally detached.

After the split, it took a long time for me to heal from the emotional damage. I hid myself away for a few years before I had the courage to look at my reality again. At first I was ashamed to admit to anyone that I had no contact with my family, which fuelled the misconception of what had actually happened. I inadvertently created a breeding field for lies to fester. I tried to compose myself by not taking other people’s emotions or perceptions too personally. I know of others who become insecure or who suffer from over-achievement, all in the pursuit of self-acceptance.

You cannot control anyone else’s journey through life. Focus on your own. Compassion, honesty, self-scrutiny, and an open mind are the only ‘one way’ to interact sanely and successfully with others. (Martha Beck)

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I had many moments of doubt when I questioned my sanity. I wondered about the impact of my decision on my children and wondered if my family even missed me, but I decided that I wouldn’t conform to society’s standards just for the sake of pretence. I realised in this isolated state that other people’s opinions do not define who I am in God’s eyes. I felt freedom. There were also days when I felt completely overwhelmed by the lack of any support system. I realised I was wasting a lot of energy on negative and false emotions.

I had a choice.

I chose to stay calm and focussed on God, despite the circumstances in my life, as God really is the only constant in life.

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Why do some people interfere in other people’s lives? Because they are curious… because they are control freaks… because they can ignore their own weaknesses if they focus on yours…

Life became easier when I started to focus on my own unique abilities, talents and giftings. I had complete freedom to raise my children in my own way. Only God would make it possible for us to survive and to prosper. We could tend to our own business.

Interfering in someone else’s argument is as foolish as yanking a dog’s ears. (Proverbs 26:17)

We hear that some of you are living in idleness. You are not busy working – you are busy interfering with other people’s lives! We order and encourage such people by the Lord Jesus, the Messiah, to do their work quietly and to earn their own living. Brothers, do not get tired of doing what is right. (2 Thessalonians 3:11-13)

Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not. (1 Timothy 5:13)

I have a different perspective on the quality of relationships that I allow in my life today. If I don’t meet my own minimum requirements, I will always value other people’s opinions more than my own. The minute I fear rejection, I compromise my own well-being.

I often heard the statement that ‘happiness is an inside job’, but I know now that the people around me have a profound impact on my well-being. If I am dragged down by other people’s opinions about my life, or if someone is constantly reminding me about past failures, I see no value in the relationship. I am careful of people who keep lies alive through gossip or slander.

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Let every fox take care of its own tail. (Italian Proverb)

Keep your nose out of another’s mess. (Denmark Proverb)

Great minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, small minds discuss people. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

After many years of swinging between certainty and doubt, I found my final solace in the Bible. The Old Testament is filled with stories of family conflict and disrupted relationships. More often than not, the feud resulted in a good outcome.

I know today that God sometimes allows conflict for a specific purpose. When that happens to me, He covers me with His grace.

God has evoked conflict. The conflict causes pain and shame to every player, but God doesn’t shrink from the conflict, for a holy purpose is underway. The way of God will not be explained. (Brueggemann)

God’s grace often goes against propriety, social convention, and the ‘normal’ way for this world. (Steven Fettke)

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I walk away when…

Someone gives me unsolicited advice.

I wonder if someone really wants to help me, or if they are just curious.

My situation affects someone else.

Someone intrudes on my turf.

I feel blind sighted.

I feel like a fish being reeled into someone else’s issues.

Good advice

If you overhear something of note between two people, or a group of people, but the topic does not concern you or affect you in any way, then let the matter stay between the people it concerns. (Unknown)

There is nothing more provocative than minding your own business. (William S. Burroughs)

Don’t bother to ring a bell in the ear that doesn’t listen. Move to another ear, and if he doesn’t listen to your bell, sit back and listen to his nemesis. (Michael Bassey Johnson)

You would be very surprised with how much positive changes you could make in your life, if you could make it your top priority to mind your own business. (Edmond Mbiaka)

To be busy minding other people’s business, is to leave one’s personal business unattended to. (Edmond Mbiaka)

While you are too busy minding other people’s business, who is minding yours? (Edmond Mbiaka)

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Filed under Geestelijke aangelegenheden, Knowledge & Wisdom, Quotations from Holy Scriptures, Quotations or Citations, Spiritual affairs

Welcoming writing that can help to heal, to grow and to learn about ourself

In this world often people have to go to struggles and sometimes have to undergo big chocks to be placed in the reality of this life and to see and take an other crossroads.

For the founder of this lifestyle magazine it took two near death experiences before he at last came to concentrate even more on the more important spiritual matters of life. A parallelisation brought him to have enough time, lying flat on his back, having to be fed, he had enough time to once more in his life examine the Bible, his life, the way and the reasons of life.

Sometimes our whole life, our whole world has to fall apart before we come to change certain things in our life and come to know ourselves even better. Sometimes we also do have to go deep, but come to remember that joy more than once hid herself. How far and hard we do sometimes have to search to find her. {versplinterde drome}

Perhaps you too like Marcus Ampe and Liza Borstlap have to find ways to handle suffering. Though for the founder of this blog, he knew God already a long time and wanted to give the Divine Creator service already from early in his life, he also had to do a job to earn his living. He too had to make the best of his worldly life. Very often he was ‘put to the test’ and had to conquer many difficulties. That way he came to discover a greater desire for God.
Our newly joined writer also knows

Then everything, both good and bad, becomes redemptive. It moves us toward the God we desire.

and advices us

Enter your thirst. Feel your ache, the very worst ache that throbs in your soul. Face how you harm others, your spouse, your children, your friends. And face your disappointment with them. {versplinterde drome}

Life, Love & Pain

Life, Love & Pain (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Too often we are becoming blinded by the pains and difficulties we our encountering.

Danger  is that we too often let ourselves being carried away from the right track, because of our difficulties and pain.

says Marcus Ampe, whilst our fresh new author would add

When dreams shatter and pain is blinding, we’re prevented from moving ahead in our own light. {versplinterde drome}

she learned

that an awareness of inadequacy is neither a curse to lift nor a disorder to cure. It is a gift to be received, a gift that if properly used can make me powerful and strong and clear and wise. {versplinterde drome}

Our new author at her blog gives much of herself away. So if you would like to know her better, get to read her interesting blog “Heart prints”. At it she shows how she learned a lot in 2002 about the grace and wisdom of God. She learned about herself and saw with her own eyes how terrible things happened to her, but also how those turned later to make it to her advantage.

She also knows that there is an endurance that is too far for her to attain. Like the founder of this blog is aware we often need such battles in our life to end up in situations which make life worth living and give ourself a good reason to be here.

We do have to be kneaded and modelled, by time and many circumstances, having to build patience and endurance, to make life for something, and for not to loss a lot of qualities.

English: Rampton Parish Church Millennium Bann...

Rampton Parish Church Millennium Banner Displayed alongside the hymn board, it depicts (1) The Glory of the Lord appearing in the Cloud (Exod. 16:10); (2) The Fire of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost (Acts 2:3); (3) The Tree of Life (Rev. 22:2); (4) Rampton Parish Church; (5) Man tills the soil (Gen. 3:23); (6) God so loved the world (Jn. 3:16); (7) The Tree of Knowledge (Gen. 2:16); (8) The Old and the New Covenant (Song of Songs 2:4); (9) The Advent Candle (Jn. 1:9) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The process of cutting away the ‘dead wood’ or nasty smudges may be a painful process, but by working and trying hard we may come to reach a goal worth looking at.

When we dared to look at the new author her blog to see what she wrote in her diary we found that

It sometimes feels like I’m standing on the shore and see people struggling in the waves.
People that I cared, “shared a life.
I can not help anyone, I do not have the ability.
But I hope that they will be tired of the nonsense and trivialities, that something will happen so they can experience the peace of God. {hardepad – Stukkies uit my dagboek 2002 ~ 2012}

That is also why we welcome her greatly and do hope she, like other authors on this blog, can share their hopes in God and in their fellow man. People coming along here willing to look at our blessings and the good things of life. Seeing themselves as miniscule elements always remembering how pointless a life without God is and how void. Knowing that when we find God and are willing to share His Grace we not only have to be so grateful for the peace here on the shore, in the fields and in the woods.

On this blog, many of the writers with her, have their heart going out to the man who had to endure so much. In the knowledge there is still so much to do, she with us want to bring thoughts, answers, and hopefully some clue of hope.

Where a massive amount of doors slam in my face.
Where roads immediately ends.
Here where all plans go wrong …
Where thoughts and words fail finally … {hardepad – Stukkies uit my dagboek 2002 ~ 2012}

We are happy she is willing to share thoughts of hope and wants to look with us at her, our and others their life and look at options we may have.

With utter despair?
Or with joy for the gift pack coming?

Processed with Rookie Cam

We do hope we all shall enjoy the words shared here and giving us fresh air, opening windows also to other writers, photographers, nice pictures and texts which can enlighten us and inspire us.

We would advice our and her readers to go with her and other presented authors here, looking at it when

All seems possible and feel now.
Today.
To breathe.
Arms open, lifting your head and going to meet the light.

This new author has felt, like many of us, emotional pressure, time constraints, and work-related issues that needed all her focus and attention.  She tried to hide the stress and realised that her  turmoil was visible.

Everyone could read it on my face.  The pressure was so immense that it felt as if I was captured in a boiler, and that the all-consuming fire below me brought the boiler to boiling point.

she writes in “As I unclutter my life, I free myself to answer the callings of my soul“.

As internal war can rage in ourselves, we can use some voices and reactions form others to get us free from our trapped, irritated self.

Our suitcases are filled with all kinds of dead weight: habits we need to give up, attitudes we’ve long since outgrown, and activities and possessions that no longer serve a reasonable purpose. (Nancy Twigg)

It is nice she now comes to open her suitcases here and is, like some other contributors here, willing to unpack her treasures of ‘findings’, her ‘gemstones’.
Like Mr. Ampe she also had to push the reset button to remind herself of her personal values.

The discord comes when I forget about my own values, and start living out other people’s values.  I subconsciously make other people’s priorities my own.  For me, the result is stress and misery. {As I unclutter my life, I free myself to answer the callings of my soul}

We are convinced just by willing to share experiences, by opening up to others, willing to show our weaknesses, but also our strengths, and showing others Who gives us the strength to face this difficult life, that lots of our stress and difficulties may also melt as butter in the sun.

By falling and getting up again we come to see, that no matter what happens in life, always there is  a wonderful dream available.

That if pursued will generate an unfamiliar, radically new internal experience. That experience, strange at first, will eventually be recognised as joy. {versplinterde drome}

You will see, sharing the dream is a nice experience, enriching us all and giving hope to more people.

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Find also to read

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Additional reading

  1. The longer you wait
  2. Determine the drive
  3. Suffering redemptive because Jesus redeemed us from sin
  4. Preaching to an unbelieving world
  5. Even in tough times remembering the blessings
  6. Your struggles develop your strengths
  7. We are to be joyful in the midst of our trials
  8. Be not afraid of those trials which God may see fit to send upon thee
  9. Faith and trial
  10. A Living Faith #4 Effort
  11. A Living Faith #5 Perseverance
  12. A Living Faith #12 The Love for Jesus
  13. A “seed” for the blessing of all mankind would come through the family of Abraham
  14. God should be your hope
  15. God is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him
  16. The truth is very plain to see and God can be clearly seen
  17. The first on the list of the concerns of the saint
  18. Unconditional love
  19. Remember there’s a light in the next day
  20. Clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience
  21. The soul has no rainbow if the eyes have no tears
  22. A man who cannot forgive others
  23. The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands
  24. Love will cure more sins than condemnation
  25. Frank risks taking
  26. If your difficulties are longstanding, try kneeling
  27. Tapping into God’s Strength by Waiting on Him
  28. Old Man of Prayer
  29. A treasure which can give me everything I need
  30. Patience is the ability to count down before blasting off
  31. Careful what you sow, it might grow
  32. Be kinder than necessary
  33. Guard well within yourself that treasure, kindness

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Further of interest

  1. Wisdom Not to Waste Our Trials
  2. Endurance and Change
  3. Things I’ve Learned About the Olympics via Facebook and Tumblr
  4. “Race” Report (It’s long!)
  5. The Race That Matters
  6. Nine Days – Day Four
  7. Both Sides Now
  8. Training to Climb 8,000 metre peak
  9. Cho Oyu Summit – Down, but not out!
  10. Trusting Our Coach in Times of Stretching
  11. Sunday S.O.A.P. – 21 Aug 2016
  12. The Excellence of Patience
  13. More than a Conqueror
  14. May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same

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