Tag Archives: Comparing ourselves

to Strive to get lessons of living life

One of our readers  officially graduated from the Dale Carnegie course which strives to teach the lesson of living life, which is something that reader and we do believe each of us should constantly be conscious of and getting better at.

That visitor of our ecclesia-site like so many would love to see his best version of himself. Understandably would not be that the best thing to hope for?

He knows there is no substitute for good health and we can do a lot to keep ourselves well. Too often lots of people do forget that we have a lot of power over our lives and we can effectively realize and use it by just being intentional. As told more than once at this site, the ideal visualization of the future generates positive feelings and hopes, which is an important part of the journey to get there. We have to set a goal and think positively.

The nagging feeling in itself is not a great motivator or productivity inducer. Even worse constant confrontation with the negative thought pulls us down. So we better avoid contact with negativeness, be it thoughts or even negative people or people who have a bad influence on us.

We should have confidence in ourselves, knowing that what we want to do is not impossible! concerning that matter he writes

And this probability is not from factors outside of our control. The ratio shows how many people come up with the strength to win against the odds. It can be up to us what side of this ratio we land on. {Draw Your Future}

He looks at Patti Dobrolowski her model and wants to highlight her explanation of a factor that makes her strategy work:

Your brain actually emits serotonin and oxytocin when you draw and dream. So you feel happy. Capable. Creative.” Who wouldn’t want to feel that? Without getting too scientific about it, serotonin and oxytocin do affect mood positively and they can also be attained by exercise or a detailed daydream so whenever you need a boost, you can also try that. {Draw Your Future}

All of us should know we are fallible, but all those around us are as us also not perfect and have their faults and limits. We should not always compare ourselves to others but believe in ourself going for what we believe we should and can do. We should set our mind to delivering on that, knowing that it is in our power. And if we need some help, we also should know there is always Some One high above Who is stronger and mightier than all beings, Who can help us.

The effort to realize this reality in our visitors life started well before the Dale Carnegie course. He was encouraged by it, and wants to continue on his path for long after. He writes

With work and personal issues clouding my mind, I did not get a chance to appreciate the course as much as I would have liked (I failed at being intentional there but we all have our down days). However, I hope that, in coming time, I can realize some benefits from the foundation that the course set for me. I also want to learn more about the man and the movement that grew into this program. {The Power in Me}

We would advise him to look beyond the doors of that institution and to get even more wisdom in the Book of books, trusting in the Most High Establisher Elohim, God His Power but also the power which can grow in himself, which is the power each of us at to be on the look-out for.

For now, he leaves his readers on Matters of Living with a good thought from Dale Carnegie, which we like to repeat here too:

Are you bored with life?
Then throw yourself into
some work you believe
in with all your heart,
live for it, die for it,
 and you will find
happiness that you
had thought could
never be yours.

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Related

  1. Power Posts: Motivational Snapshots
  2. Power Posts: Inspiration
  3. Power Posts: On Life
  4. Nothing Takes Place Outside Consciousness 4/5
  5. Once you feel avoided…
  6. Today’s Scripture – April 18, 2018

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Filed under Being and Feeling, Health affairs, Lifestyle, Positive thoughts, Religious affairs, Social affairs, Welfare matters

In your own heart or outside of it

“Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”
Carl Gustav Jung

“We usually look outside of ourselves for heroes and teachers.
It has not occurred to most people that they may already be the role model they seek.
The wholeness they are looking for may be trapped within themselves by beliefs, attitudes, and self-doubt.
But our wholeness exists in us now.
Trapped though it may be, it can be called upon for guidance, direction, and most fundamentally, comfort. It can be remembered.
Eventually we may come to live by it.”
– Rachel Naomi Remen, Kitchen Table Wisdom 10th Anniversary

 

 

Dr Austin Ejaife, [an Olorogun, the ‘Ugo’ of Agbon Kingdom] asks where we look for answers, direction, and meaning in our lives.

These Dreams

These Dreams (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Who has not high aspirations becoming somebody very important or well known? When we grow up we are first of all confronted with the female so close to us, because we where inside her for nine months, that we have a special, sometimes very sacred relationship with her. Mostly all infants look up at their mother.

Next in line comes the father who often is pushed from his throne by the teacher. How many children do not go in dispute with their father, because the teacher told so and so? From toddler going into our teens we loose innocence and start comparing those adults more and more.

Looking at those grown ups we at first admire them a lot, for what they can and for what they say. They bring us to dream about who we ourselves could become, … like them …

Dr Austin Ejaife wonders

Do we look outside–dreaming with hopes and aspirations of things to come, things that may or may not someday be in the future? Or do we turn our gaze inward–towards our own heart–to find our true beauty and awaken our power, our potential, our true ability.

Though the world may turn around us in our eyes often we do not believe enough in ourselves. For us it does not seem to be possible that everything that could ever be possible… already lies inside of us. The writer of Finding Your Clarity Of Purpose may find that our true beauty, our power, our potential, our true ability, is patiently awaiting us to look there and discover it, to recognize it, and to use it, but for many people this shall stay a long undiscovered path.

Because many people not knowing that everything is in themselves, they miss out on a lot of things and are not able to find true fulfilment and happiness. We also should know and come to understand that real full happiness with no problems and sorrows at all, does not exist. There is no such thing as a world without sorrow. Like every rose has its thorns our life is full of  thorns but also hopefully full of flowers with nice smells. Problem with many people is that they are so much focussing on the dark side of their life that they do not see the sun-rays nor the vibrant colours.

Ejaife writes

Do not let your vision be clouded with dreams or ideas that some outside force can bring you fulfillment in life… it cannot and will not; only you have the ability to unlock your purpose and potential. Clarity of vision comes to us when we look within our hearts and see ourselves for who we are, who we have been, and who we can be, and then trust ourselves fully and completely.

Why are so many afraid of their inner “I“? why are so many afraid to become confronted with the “I am” they are?

We should be not afraid to grow up and to try to become ourself, daring to look into our own heart to find clarity of purpose and meaning.

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Preceding articles

The I Am to explore

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Other articles of interest

 

  1. What is life?
  2. Looking at three “I am” s
  3. There is no true and constant gentleness without humility
  4. A great man does not lose his self-possession when he is afflicted

 

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Filed under Being and Feeling, Educational affairs, Knowledge & Wisdom, Quotations or Citations

Failures, mistakes and Initiatives for Excellence and success, Working towards turning a Dream of yours into reality

We all have to have dreams. Without dreams we shall not accomplish much in life.

Dr Austin Ejaife, [an Olorogun, the ‘Ugo’ of Agbon Kingdom] a Professional Tax, Audit, Accounting, Strategy and Global Corporate Governance Consultant, who also wants to be Motivational Speaker, Inspiration mover, Political Critic and Social Crusader with passion for good governance, advocacy and empowerment for Positive Change, reflects how he views and interpret real life issues, current news items from around the world and Nigeria in particular. But he has also some good food for thinking for those in the West as well.

He writes about are do’s and don’ts and knows we all make mistakes and have to live with them, but are better to look forward to the tomorrow which will come–and it is up to us how we choose to face the day ahead of us.

The mistakes of yesterday are in the past, and with the right attitude and some effort, today will find us making fewer. {Leave Yesterday’s Mistakes In The Past… And Bring The Lessons With You So That You Will Not Repeat Them}

English: Some APEX teen leaders were invited t...

Some APEX teen leaders were invited to a breakfast (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In our previous article we looked at some celebrities. Several highly placed people or those who are in the picture for a while may get a certain attitude. It is not weird or strange to find leaders filled with abnormal hubris lacking internal validation. Dr. Austin Ejajaife tells about some wonderful studies, that shows the corroding effects of ego and how leaders are more likely to suffer from disease of fixing fat compensation, acquiring other firms and engaging in other risky strategies to feed their egos. Leaders ought to cultivate humility. {Initiatives For Excellence: Avoiding Arrogance of Power}

Successful people are able to come into the danger zone, becoming a leader, or anyone in a position of power and authority, having to avoid the trap of arrogance of power.

Everything rises and falls on leadership,”

says Dr. John C. Maxwell,

“but knowing how to lead is only half the battle. Understanding leadership and actually leading are two different activities.” {Initiatives For Excellence: 12 Major Signs Of Leadership In Danger (I)}

Dr Austin Ejaife *(Ugo1)* writes

World leaders attending the Progressive Govern...

World leaders attending the Progressive Governance Conference 2009 in Chile. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The key to transforming yourself from someone who understands leadership to a person who successfully leads in the real world is character. Your character qualities activate and empower your leadership ability, or they can stand in the way of your success
Dr. Ted Engstrom  says that organisation succeed or fail for many different reasons.

Even the mature organization or nation is not without its hazards. In many ways the dangers that it faces are more subtle. They are often the result of success rather than failure. {Initiatives For Excellence: 12 Major Signs Of Leadership In Danger (I)}

We would say it is not only leadership in danger but also for our own success we have to be careful not to settle for the status quo. We also should know that new ideas shall bring with them a conflict of interest, and conflict of interest brings internal tension. We continuously have to work around those feelings and cope with that internal tension.

Quality is far more important than quantity. Size or quantity must always be secondary to the effectiveness. Discriminating between breadth and depth is not easy. That is why there is a real danger here. Leaders may have a great desire to expand throughout and beyond our community or to the rest of the world, but if the quality of our products or services is not being continually strengthened, then, we may discover that we have over-extended ourselves. {Initiatives For Excellence: 12 Major Signs Of Leadership In Danger (I)}

We always should know ourselves and have to be realistic what we can do and what we can handle, never forgetting to listen to others and to look around us, noticing what is going on and how society reacts to certain things. One of those dangers when looking around is that we view a situation from a limited point of view.

The only failures that really exist are choosing to hold onto limiting thoughts such as, “There is nothing we can do to move beyond this situation.” Life is a series of decisions. If something didn’t work out in the past, accept what happened as being an incident from the past, and be willing to move on. If we are spending time trying to change the past, we have limited ourselves from moving forward. Please remind yourself that we cannot change what has already happened. We can change how we feel about past situations. {Turn Your Failure Into Accomplishment!}

Reality (Dream album)

Reality (Dream album) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Lots of people look up at what they think may be the success or happiness of somebody else. They keep comparing themselves with others and get pulled down or frustrated. By doing so they often are limiting themselves.

Limiting beliefs always create limited outcomes. Limited thinking also keeps us stuck from moving beyond the imaginary walls known as our comfort zones. If we really wish to turn failure, disappointment, or frustration into something positive, we need to be willing to step out of the comfort zone arena. Whenever we approach any situation in a limited manner, it is because we are holding onto excuses and fear. When we feel limited or challenged usually also results in feeling discouraged.

Discouragement translates into more excuses; and eventually because of thinking from a limited point of view causes us to stop working on achieving our goal(s). By understanding that in order to experience disappointment or failure, if we can recognise that we made a decision to stop, quit or give up, is only a decision. This incredible insight suggests that if we were to make better decisions we can turn the whole thing around. {Turn Your Failure Into Accomplishment!}

We should remember

When working on goals, instead of approaching the situation as difficult, vague or impossible, let us begin by changing our point of view. By beginning to use positive intentions helps us to view tasks as being possible and manageable. We are changing what we are holding in mind. Instead of responding with,

“Maybe tomorrow… or giving yourself some other excuse,”

make a decision that focuses on easily completing the task. A better response would be,

“I can easily take care of this,”

and give yourself a reasonable period of time to accomplish the task (i.e. by the end of day, week, or month, etc.). By approaching tasks as easy, and also providing a reasonable timeframe, allows us to take the appropriate actions to accomplish the task without getting discouraged. {Turn Your Failure Into Accomplishment!}

The writer of the blog which we advice you to visit, is convinced that

We are marvellous and unique beings, created by a loving God for a purpose that is quite perfectly our own.

Who is to say that our dreams have to be like theirs, or anyone else’s in this world for that matter? Just because someone else dreams of amassing new things, more power, greater wealth, or more fame, does not mean we, too, share the same passion. Perhaps we just want to travel the world more, or dream of a simpler life with less stress and more peace. {Work Towards Turning A Dream Of Yours Into Reality}

Looking at what Douglas Everett says:

“There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other.”

Ejaife thinks there is more than simply realizing that we are in charge of choosing our own dreams in life.

We must also realize that within us, we possess the ability to turn those dreams into our reality, if we but dare to take the necessary steps to make them come true. What did you dream of as a child? Have you realized any of those dreams? What do you dream of today? How do you feel when you are focused on those dreams? As children, we often allowed ourselves to dream with the idea that any one of those dreams could come true. But as we grow older, we often times buy into what other people consider reality, and our dreams get pushed aside, packed away, and perhaps even forgotten. {Work Towards Turning A Dream Of Yours Into Reality}

When looking at the screen of your television and hearing about all those celebrities, remind yourself that all that fame is temporarily and does not always brings that luck hoped for.

Ejaife brings questions to consider. We should think about what we want to do in our life and with our life. We should ask ourself why we are so often afraid to tackle certain issues.

Why do we often put our dreams on hold?

How can we go about turning our dreams into our realities?

What differences do you see between dreams and reality?

For further thought:

“Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living.” ~ Anais Nin

> Please do read:Work Towards Turning A Dream Of Yours Into Reality and find more interesting articles by Dr Austin Ejaife

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Preceding articles:

The Goal

Attitude of Unstopable Success

Gender connections

Getting fate in your change to positiveness

Helping to create a Positive Attitude

Material wealth, Submission and Heaven on earth

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Find also to read:

  1. Why “Selfishness” Doesn’t Properly Mean Being Shortsighted and Harmful to Others
  2. Subcutaneous power for humanity 5 Loneliness, Virtual and real friends
  3. Opportunity!
  4. At first looking like a loss
  5. Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement
  6. The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking places
  7. Fear of failure, and fear of the unknown
  8. Some one or something to fear #4 Families and Competition
  9. Failing Man to make free choice
  10. Let not sin reign in your mortal body

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Filed under Being and Feeling, Economical affairs, Educational affairs, Knowledge & Wisdom, Lifestyle, Political affairs, Social affairs, Welfare matters

Believe in yourself!

Logo of ACCEPT

We often fall in the trap of creating too high expectations and comparing ourselves with others. In case we are willing to accept our ‘honest self’ we shall find an easier life, giving more meaning to our saying “I am”.

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Remember you have to :

  • accept yourself.
  • take care of your mind, body and soul
  • treat yourself with love, respect and care
  • do meaningful things => reminds you how worth it you are
  • have relativism
  • recognise your enormous potential inside -> empower all your best qualities to continuing learning and trusting in yourself
  • stop overestimating other people opinions
  • ignore negative criticisms
  • listen to the constructive remarks
  • create your own opinion.
  • = Accept yourself, take care of yourself, love yourself ==> You are worth it.

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Filed under Being and Feeling, Lifestyle, Re-Blogs and Great Blogs